[outlander psl au]

[womanofvalue]

The ground was saturated with so much rain that Peggy thought she might be washed away, but just because the plains were soaked didn't mean that the drills stopped. The soldiers didn't know it yet, but the landings were going to arrive sooner than anyone wanted and that meant no one can be untrained, lest they end up paying with their lives on those beaches. Today, when the fog rolled in, her superiors informed her that she would be running orienteering with her men, eliciting a sharp 'sir, yes, sir' from Peggy before she took the maps to her own private tent in order to brief the Lieutenants.

Leaning over to study the map, her stubborn engagement ring catches her eye. It had managed to escape from where she had tucked it away, just like all her thoughts about Fred. Their engagement was a terse and stressful thing. When she had announced that she was going into the field with the SSR, he had threatened to leave her. It had been her mother that had convinced Fred to wait Peggy out, insisting that once the war was over, things would change.

As much as Peggy was fond of Fred, she was beginning to see the splinters in their engagement turn to wider cracks, chasms so wide that you could lose sight of the love you once shared and guided you towards that engagement. Carefully, she pushed the ring back, securing it with one of her brassiere straps. Snapping her compass shut, she gave the objective and the orders. "I'll be out in the field to keep an eye on each platoon. The first to reach the objective will not run additional miles," she promised.

"The others will be doing laps around the base, respective to their finishing position." Folding up the map, she handed one to each of her four Lieutenants. "Let them look at it for a few hours, then to the navigator." With a few more orders, she allowed them to prepare as she herself got ready. She tugged on knee-high rain boots, an overcoat, and despite the misty fog in the air, she double-checked that her hair and makeup was in good shape.

Several hours later found Peggy in the thick of drills, listening to the shouts of men in the distance as they worked their way towards her and the objective. Standing there with a brolly, she glanced at her pocketwatch and decided mentally that she would see the first platoon in no more than forty-five minutes. Clasping the watch shut, the echo of it was drowned by another sound -- one that didn't belong. The sound of twigs and branches crunching made Peggy reach for her pistol, simply to be ready.

"Phillips?" she called out, thinking perhaps something had happened and she needed to recall her men. She saw the silhouette of what appeared to be a man in the fog and she found herself inexplicably drawn towards him, mainly because it simply didn't make any sense. "Who's there?" she asked, when it was clear that the man she was seeing didn't bear resemblance to anyone on base. This close, she could see that his hair had a strange look to it, not to mention his clothes. "Has there been an accident?" What could have happened to render the man in such a state?

(Peggy also did not need to allow her conscious thoughts to become aware of how handsome the man was, despite the fact she feared she was already a lost cause, given the way she was filled with a renewed warmth and how her gaze lingered)

They were inside a ring of large stones, which she vaguely recalled the locals warning her about. She had paid little mind, marking them perfunctorily on the map before moving on, but now she had to wonder if the talk of strange rituals wasn't at least a little true. Forty-five minutes. She had forty-five minutes until the men arrived, surely she could deal with this surprise in that time.

Comments

[womanofvalue]

The jealousy only gets worse. Peggy feels utterly disgusted with herself, especially when she can lay no claim to this man, but she can't help herself. There's a feeling that she has, as if Steve is more important than ever she knows, and to hear him admit that somewhere out there is the perfect woman to match the other half of his soul makes Peggy feel woefully inadequate to whomever this perfect woman might be. "I think so, too," she says, quietly. "That there's someone out there that perfectly resembles your other half, the one that isn't so much your exact match, but your equal in all things, who understands you and completes you, jagged edges and all." Someone who accepts you for who you are and not the prospect of what you could be, with just enough polish and spit and work.

She drives in silence for a few minutes after that, wishing she had something to cheer her from this strange grief in her chest at sending this man back to a future and some other woman, telling herself that it's just her dissatisfaction with Fred making her feel this way (ignoring that it hadn't happened until now, despite a legion of decent men around her). "Well, lucky her, whomever she is," she says, finally, her words ringing flat.

[bearstheshield]

"Lucky that you found yours," Steve says politely. It feels a little hollow since she is engaged and he hasn't felt this tug toward a woman in a long time but he can't fall for her. She's engaged to someone else, for one, and for two, he's not even from this era. He came here from the future through a set of magic stones. It's a story that's hard to believe for anyone, even someone who's saved the world more than once.

"He's going to be a very happy husband some day."

[womanofvalue]

She doesn't say anything, because the truth is that Fred isn't her equal and he won't be a happy husband unless Peggy stops working and settles down to have his children. She frowns, fearing that it's clear from her expression that she's far from happy, but how on earth does she tell that to a man she's co-opted for a dangerous mission that she intends to help back to his time.

"My romantic life isn't your concern, happy or no," she says, trying to push past her dissatisfaction, pressing down on the gas pedal so they'll travel faster.

[bearstheshield]

"I'm sorry," Steve says. His tone is truly contrite because in spite of being from the modern era, he's an old-fashioned kind of guy. He still pulls out chairs and holds doors for women and he doesn't like to pry. He likes his own space, when he can get it, and it's a precious thing when you're military because you spend so often living out of each others' pockets that you don't know when the next time will come that you'll get a space of your own.

"I didn't mean to poke at your personal life. We just kind of meandered into the subject but it was none of my business. Do you want to switch off the driving and get some rest?"

[womanofvalue]

She could use the rest, primarily because when they reach their destination, she'll be working and translating. "Yes, that does seem the smartest plan," she admits, glad that she's able to fall asleep wherever she's given space to. She still drives until she sees a place to pull over, grateful that it's not too far and it gives them a space to change seats.

"I don't mind talking about my personal life, it's simply not as perfect as everyone assumes," is what she says, while she's making a spot in the back of the car for herself to sleep. "We were sweethearts at school, that's all. My mother wants this for me because otherwise, she's sure there's no other man for me." Truthfully, most days, Peggy would prefer no other man to the future she's staring down.

[bearstheshield]

"Nobody's life is as perfect as you want it to seem on the outside. It's easier now. In my time? Everyone puts their personal business out for the world to see," Steve explains. He doesn't necessarily know how to go about explaining Facebook and Twitter to someone in the 1940s but he thinks that will suffice for now.

"Even the most mundane details have to be presented in a way to make them seem like they're fantastic and beyond belief. It's exhausting."

[womanofvalue]

Peggy rests her cheek on the beddings below her, listening to Steve's voice as it washes over her, finding it more comforting than she would have expected. It's terribly annoying to feel this sort of pull to someone else, especially someone from the future, but she doesn't mind the way that his voice is so warm and soft, lulling her in.

"People should retain their privacy," she insists, even as she yawns, belying how sleepy she is. It's been a very long few days and she's only human, regardless of what her shoulders think. "I value mine more than most," she says, her eyes falling closed as they drive. "Wake me up when we hit the cliffs," she murmurs sleepily.

[bearstheshield]

"I'll wake you, promise." Steve lets her sleep as long as he can, though, because he knows that what lies ahead of them is likely going to be difficult and they're not going to have much in the way of rest from here on out. When they reach the cliffs, he pulls the car over to stop and just watches her for a moment before shaking his head to clear it.

"Peggy," he says softly, gently nudging her shoulder to wake her. "We're here."

[womanofvalue]

She'd been in the midst of a terrible dream; terrible only in that it's the sort of dream a woman isn't supposed to be having and it's not about Fred. There are big hands working her legs open, sliding all over the pale skin of her body, and Peggy lets out a soft exhalation, hearing the man's voice wash over her, a pleasurable thing as she finds herself between sleep and waking.

"Steve," she sighs out with a tiny moan, curling in a little tighter. It takes her a moment to realize that it's not the man in her dream saying her name, but rather, the actual man. She jolts awake, hair in disarray, and stares at him in shock. "We're here?" she asks, when she composes herself.

[bearstheshield]

"We're here," Steve says softly. "You fell asleep." Peggy is flushed and disheveled and Steve has to put out of his mind just how beautiful she looks right now. She's made it clear she's engaged and this is a mission; he isn't going to keep pushing her when she's made it evident that their relationship is going to be work-based and platonic.

"Do you need a minute to get your bearings?"

[womanofvalue]

Peggy needs a moment to ground herself in reality, truth be told. She's a little dizzy and hazy yet, trying to recall that the man in her dream whispering to her and touching her is the one sitting in the Jeep with her, but that it isn't her fiancé. Embarrassed, she hopes she's not flushed too badly as she works to put her hair in a low knot, clearing her throat.

"Our contact is meeting us here, we'll cross over and continue to make headway. The best way to attack the fortress is at night, with you as my backup. I can't have you going in there with me, it might set off alarms," she says. "Seeing as you hardly look conspicuous, with all those muscles of yours, do you?"

[bearstheshield]

Steve looks down at his chest for a moment before looking back at her. "I didn't think the US Army wanted weaklings out on the front lines so I decided to eat my vegetables. Sorry it's not going to help me blend in."

He's not prone to sarcasm or jokes but something about Peggy Carter makes him a little more playful than usual. Without a team to look out for, he feels a little more reckless.

[womanofvalue]

She cocks a brow upwards, her lips curved up in a somewhat mean smirk because she's terribly amused by the dramatics from him. "Clearly, you didn't stop with the spinach," is her retort, checking herself in the mirror as she applies a new coat of lipstick and tucks away one of the last errant curls before she readies herself for the next leg of the trip. "Leave the keys in the ignition, someone will be along to pick it up," she advises, hauling her bag from the back.

"You'll blend just fine on the boat and the drive, it's the actual fortress itself that will prove worrisome, mainly because if Zola or Schmidt find you, I can't promise they won't want to experiment on you," she says, with an edge of warning in her tone.

[bearstheshield]

"They'd have to get their hands on me first. I can handle myself against more than one man," Steve assures her. His training has meant he's to be a shield for all comers, to take the punishment for everyone else so they can get in and out. He's not going to let the mission fail on his account and he's going to put his body between Peggy's and danger. That's just how it works.

"It'll be a hell of a job for them to pull off."

[womanofvalue]

She smirks as she imagines the picture that could be, Steve running in circles while men chase after him with great determination. She hides that smile with a hand as she walks towards the port, reaching her hand back for him. If they're posing as a couple, they need to be a touch more convincing that they are, right now.

"I don't know," she muses, "I think that if no one's been able to catch you, they're simply not doing it right," she says, assessing him in a minute and deciding she already knows precisely how she would take him down.

[bearstheshield]

Steve snorts a little. "You've never seen me run before," he admits. "Because if you had, you'll understand why nobody can catch me. I'm not someone you can take down easily."

He squeezes her hand lightly. It's for show, in part, but in part it's also for for him. He's starting to get attached to Peggy Carter.

[womanofvalue]

"And you've clearly never been taken out at the knees by someone in the right position," she counters, seeing as she's already imagining how she'd clothesline Steve Rogers, if given the opportunity, and has somehow mentally determined that she will, at some point, get the best of him to prove her point.

She's hardly stubborn at all, she's no idea how that rumour might have gotten started. She presents their paperwork when they reach the counter, chattering away idly about visiting relatives and hoping that the war won't put things off to much, how they've been guaranteed safe passage. They receive odd stares, of course, but they'll divert as far west as they can around the coast in order to avoid most of the issues.

"Good luck," is the response, from a man who clearly thinks them dead before they leave, but Peggy just needs to get past him to the contacts on the boat who know their actual purpose. Steve's hand is still in hers, she realizes, which is odd because she hadn't registered it at all. It had been a steady, silent comfort throughout, as if she's already used to it there.

[bearstheshield]

Their hands fit well together. He fits to Peggy like a glove, in some ways, and it seems they'll work well in concert on this mission in spite of not having much time to prepare or acclimate themselves to one another. He's glad for it. Steve has never been capable of faking intimacy but at least in this instance, none of what he feels has to be faked; he definitely wishes Peggy Carter didn't have a ring on her finger.

"They think we're going to fail. Have you ever failed at anything you've been tasked with by the government?"

[womanofvalue]

"Not once," is Peggy's determined reply, a stubborn edge in her gaze as she stares forward. Perhaps it's a dangerous thing, seeing as she's not prone to listen to reason now that she's been challenged with even the potential for failure, but she doesn't appreciate men implying she's weak and useless.

Besides that, she can't fail this mission. Erskine's formula is far, far too important. "There," she says, waving as she sees the boat. "There's our ride. Grab our things, darling," she adds absently, sharing a quick, mischievous wink before she heads down to the dock.

[bearstheshield]

Steve reaches back and grabs their things, glad that he's spurred Peggy on to thinking she's going to succeed and succeed above and beyond on this mission. She seems more than capable of this and he wishes he had someone like her on his team back home; she'd be more than welcome, even without enhancement.

"Let's show them what we're made of, sweetheart," he says, nuzzling her hair lightly just because he can.

[womanofvalue]

Peggy heads towards the boat after taking a moment to subdue the shiver that jolts through her at the way he'd curled in so close to her and how right it had felt. She tells herself not to let herself drift away into the fantasy she's built to protect herself.

She gives the boat driver a long look that dares him to say anything, grateful when he decides to be smart and keep his mouth shut. She waits for Steve in one of the small cabins, digging through the luggage to start gearing up with the tech that Howard's sent. Cameras and microphones, weapons, and clothing to blend in. Glancing over her shoulder, she beckons Steve inside. "Here," she says, "I think this knife would suit you," she says, holding out the bowie knife and its holster.

[bearstheshield]

"I could manage with just this," Steve agrees. It's a useful tool and one they teach in the Army even in the modern day. It can save your life, a good knife, but he hopes nobody gets close enough for him to have to use it. Knives have a distinct disadvantage over guns - they require close range. He's hoping that he and Peggy won't be found out.

"I'm hoping it won't come to that, though. I want it to be a clean extraction, if we can make it that way."

[womanofvalue]

"Ideally, we're not going to need anything, but I don't want to send you into battle without," Peggy says, sifting through the equipment for the goodnight lipstick that she will use as a last resort, if that's needed. She lifts it up and gives it a mild wiggle. "Once I put this on, do be careful not to get near my lips," she says. "I've never tried it on a man your size, but I don't want to think about what it might do and I'd rather not have to lug your frame around."

Though, she blushes a little as she applies it, grateful for the forced barrier that will prevent her from taking advantage of their cover stories to steal a kiss or two from this man.

[bearstheshield]

Steve laughs a little at the thought of her having to lug him around but he understands the concern; he's not going to go kissing her on the mouth, for sure, and she's engaged besides.

"Well, we're a reserved couple. We're not going to be necking in front of a bunch of Germans. That's improper, right?"

[womanofvalue]

She flushes, touching the back of her neck with her palm to hide the colouring there, because the mental image of what he's just said is a rather difficult one to shake, primarily because she doesn't want to dismiss it out of hand so quickly. Luckily, she recuperates easily enough, going back to outfitting herself with equipment.

"Right," she agrees promptly, slipping on a shade of that lipstick, as if to protect herself. "I'm sure they have notions about how reserved and prissy the English are, anyhow," is her irritated comment. "Though God knows what they think of you Americans."