Steve laughs a little but he accepts that compromise. He doesn't want to do
badly by Peggy and if she thinks Jarvis will help plan a good proposal,
he'll take her word for it. For now, though, he wants to enjoy the stolen
time while he has the chance.
"They've stolen so much time from us," Steve says softly. "It only seems
fair we steal some from them."
Peggy doesn't want to think too hard about that, seeing as she's simply going to get angry again about all the lost time that they've experienced. Unfortunately, there's a mission in the morning to think about and the sun is going to come up far sooner than she wants it to, no matter how much time she wants to steal back.
"I don't want to go anywhere," she admits, stretching her body out in a languid, slow stretch, sliding her knee in between his thighs to position herself perfectly. "That said, I also refuse to fail in our mission."
"We'll succeed, Peggy. There's no way that we won't," Steve assures her. It's difficult to talk about how much time they've missed because of the government and circumstances but he wants to preserve this moment for them and them alone.
"I have no doubt in my mind that we can do this. Me and you together."
She's dreamed of this with him. She'd wanted to work missions together and pursue a partnership that she knew had legs to it, something that was honest and incredible and brought the best out of them. "You know, ever since you crashed, I've been trying to live my life to standards that you would approve of," she admits, because when she finds herself without a rudder, she turns back to that.
"I thought to myself, 'is this what Steve would do', but I'm afraid I failed more than I succeeded," she notes quietly.
"Don't put me on a pedestal, Peggy," Steve warns. He props on an elbow and
watches her, gently runs a hand down the length of her body to temper his
words somewhat. He's not some great hero. He's just the guy who does what
needs to be done even if it's hard and even if it's something nobody else
dares to do. That's who he is. It's not something to be lauded - it's just
what needs to be done.
"I'm flesh and blood, all right? I make mistakes."
"You were Erskine's pick, that makes you better," Peggy remarks, speaking only fact as far as she's concerned. "You make me better," she says, earnest and honest as she holds his gaze. "I mean it, Steve, I'm not saying that you're perfect, but you make me aspire to be better than I am."
"When I want to take credit, when I want to be selfish, I remember that you do what you do not for glory or credit, but for the act of doing it. It's things like that, that's what I mean."
"You're not selfish, though. You're the kind of person who gets the job done because it's meant to be done, not because you want the credit for it."
Steve is firm in that. If she's going to laud him for his accomplishments, he'll do her the same kindness and the praise that falls from his lips is nothing but true. "I love you, Peggy Carter. No matter what."
"Sometimes, I want the credit," she admits, not wanting Steve to think that's she's entirely selfless the way that he can be. Sometimes, when she has a wonderful collar or does something, she wants that credit and has to remind herself that it's not why she did it in the first place. "I love you too, Steve," she says, cupping his cheek.
"When I thought I'd lost you..." she trails off, giving him a sad look. "I still hadn't moved on, you know. Even up until arriving here, I couldn't make myself do it."
"I'm glad you hadn't. I would have understood, of course, but it would have
broken my heart to know you were happy with someone else and living some
other life. I'm glad...I'm glad I wasn't too late for this."
He's not entirely selfless, either, and he's more selfish than anything
else when it comes to Peggy.
"I'm glad, as well," Peggy says, trying to stifle her yawn because it's not that Steve is boring her, not in the least, but at the same time, she's worn from the day, the night, and the emotions that she's laid bare before them. She curls into Steve a little closer.
"We should rest," she admits, though she hardly wants to close her eyes and take her attention off of him, for fear he might vanish. "I'm sure I'll have to entertain our mark tomorrow and I need the rest to be the perfect housewife."
"No dark circles," Steve says, brushing his thumb against her cheek.
"Because you don't have children yet so you don't have a reason to be run
ragged, right?"
He wants children someday, oh yes, but that's a conversation to be had when
they're back home and not on a mission with a mark to pursue and objectives
to accomplish. It's not for here and now, even if they're comfortably
intimate.
She opens her mouth, but only the mildest of protesting sounds comes out, because it's not fair for him to go on and say something like that and expect her not to react and want to talk about it more, because children is a conversation that she absolutely wants to have when she's alert and awake.
She glares at him and curls in closer, as if she needs to punish him and affection is her chosen weapon. "We're going to talk about that in the morning," she warns, nipping a kiss to his shoulder to inform him that what he's done is hardly polite.
"Children or marriage?" Steve asks, trailing a hand over her back and down
to her hip. He's mostly teasing about both; they're not really in a
position to discuss either until they're both out of the service and have
time to devote to them. He doesn't want to leave his children without
parents. Having grown up without a father - he doesn't want to do that to
his children.
"The children part," is what she replies with a pointed look at him, given that it's hardly a topic that you bring up in the middle of the night when a person is ready to fall back asleep. She presses her lips together firmly, but there's fondness and genuine love lingering there, seeing as it's such a Steve thing to do, throwing her so off track. "It's not a light conversation to have, now is it?" is what she points out.
Curling into the warmth of his body, she can't stifle her yawn, though she tries. "You maddening man," she says fondly.
"Look, I don't know when I'll get time with you again," Steve says,
chuckling a little. He doesn't know if he can sleep tonight because he
thinks he'll be too obsessed with holding Peggy in his arms; if he closes
his eyes, will she disappear on him?
"I have to get everything out while I can, you know?"
She doesn't want to think about it like that, but Steve is unfortunately somewhat right. After all, they've spent so long apart because of missions. What happens if they're separated again? For all that she wants to think about marriage and a future with Steve, the children they might have, they have to live in the now.
"Steve, I'm not going anywhere," she vows, because they can try and send her away, but Peggy will simply refuse. If they think that they can give her orders that she disagrees with, they'll have another thing coming. "Are you really going to let the men at the SSR give you orders?"
"When it comes to you? Probably not. I'm not going to let them order me away from you," Steve says, firm on that account. He's never going to let someone tell him he can't be with Peggy again - not now and not in the future.
"I can be stubborn as hell when I want to be. It's one of my worse qualities."
"Good," she says firmly, her eyes closed not by will, but simple requirements and a need for sleep. She's curled in with Steve and she doesn't mean to leave him, not even after this mission is through and she has to hand in all her papers and rings back to the agency. She'll tell them that she's simply decided to keep Steve out of all of it.
"You are a stubborn, overly dramatic bastard," she agrees through a yawn, tightening her hold on him. "Stubbornly keeping us awake, in point of fact."
no subject
Date: 2017-07-24 05:29 pm (UTC)Steve laughs a little but he accepts that compromise. He doesn't want to do badly by Peggy and if she thinks Jarvis will help plan a good proposal, he'll take her word for it. For now, though, he wants to enjoy the stolen time while he has the chance.
"They've stolen so much time from us," Steve says softly. "It only seems fair we steal some from them."
no subject
Date: 2017-07-25 12:22 am (UTC)"I don't want to go anywhere," she admits, stretching her body out in a languid, slow stretch, sliding her knee in between his thighs to position herself perfectly. "That said, I also refuse to fail in our mission."
no subject
Date: 2017-07-28 12:27 am (UTC)"I have no doubt in my mind that we can do this. Me and you together."
no subject
Date: 2017-07-30 08:39 pm (UTC)"I thought to myself, 'is this what Steve would do', but I'm afraid I failed more than I succeeded," she notes quietly.
no subject
Date: 2017-07-31 04:00 am (UTC)"Don't put me on a pedestal, Peggy," Steve warns. He props on an elbow and watches her, gently runs a hand down the length of her body to temper his words somewhat. He's not some great hero. He's just the guy who does what needs to be done even if it's hard and even if it's something nobody else dares to do. That's who he is. It's not something to be lauded - it's just what needs to be done.
"I'm flesh and blood, all right? I make mistakes."
no subject
Date: 2017-07-31 11:24 pm (UTC)"When I want to take credit, when I want to be selfish, I remember that you do what you do not for glory or credit, but for the act of doing it. It's things like that, that's what I mean."
no subject
Date: 2017-08-03 04:28 pm (UTC)"You're not selfish, though. You're the kind of person who gets the job done because it's meant to be done, not because you want the credit for it."
Steve is firm in that. If she's going to laud him for his accomplishments, he'll do her the same kindness and the praise that falls from his lips is nothing but true. "I love you, Peggy Carter. No matter what."
no subject
Date: 2017-08-05 12:48 am (UTC)"When I thought I'd lost you..." she trails off, giving him a sad look. "I still hadn't moved on, you know. Even up until arriving here, I couldn't make myself do it."
no subject
Date: 2017-08-07 12:00 am (UTC)"I'm glad you hadn't. I would have understood, of course, but it would have broken my heart to know you were happy with someone else and living some other life. I'm glad...I'm glad I wasn't too late for this."
He's not entirely selfless, either, and he's more selfish than anything else when it comes to Peggy.
no subject
Date: 2017-08-08 08:37 pm (UTC)"We should rest," she admits, though she hardly wants to close her eyes and take her attention off of him, for fear he might vanish. "I'm sure I'll have to entertain our mark tomorrow and I need the rest to be the perfect housewife."
no subject
Date: 2017-08-09 08:03 pm (UTC)"No dark circles," Steve says, brushing his thumb against her cheek. "Because you don't have children yet so you don't have a reason to be run ragged, right?"
He wants children someday, oh yes, but that's a conversation to be had when they're back home and not on a mission with a mark to pursue and objectives to accomplish. It's not for here and now, even if they're comfortably intimate.
no subject
Date: 2017-08-11 07:09 pm (UTC)She glares at him and curls in closer, as if she needs to punish him and affection is her chosen weapon. "We're going to talk about that in the morning," she warns, nipping a kiss to his shoulder to inform him that what he's done is hardly polite.
no subject
Date: 2017-08-14 03:35 am (UTC)"Children or marriage?" Steve asks, trailing a hand over her back and down to her hip. He's mostly teasing about both; they're not really in a position to discuss either until they're both out of the service and have time to devote to them. He doesn't want to leave his children without parents. Having grown up without a father - he doesn't want to do that to his children.
"We can discuss both tomorrow, if you want."
no subject
Date: 2017-08-14 12:45 pm (UTC)Curling into the warmth of his body, she can't stifle her yawn, though she tries. "You maddening man," she says fondly.
no subject
Date: 2017-08-20 04:20 am (UTC)"Look, I don't know when I'll get time with you again," Steve says, chuckling a little. He doesn't know if he can sleep tonight because he thinks he'll be too obsessed with holding Peggy in his arms; if he closes his eyes, will she disappear on him?
"I have to get everything out while I can, you know?"
no subject
Date: 2017-08-22 01:20 am (UTC)"Steve, I'm not going anywhere," she vows, because they can try and send her away, but Peggy will simply refuse. If they think that they can give her orders that she disagrees with, they'll have another thing coming. "Are you really going to let the men at the SSR give you orders?"
no subject
Date: 2017-08-26 04:55 pm (UTC)"I can be stubborn as hell when I want to be. It's one of my worse qualities."
no subject
Date: 2017-08-27 10:48 pm (UTC)"You are a stubborn, overly dramatic bastard," she agrees through a yawn, tightening her hold on him. "Stubbornly keeping us awake, in point of fact."